It's all coming together...only by the Grace of God

Three months ago, May 2011, I was faced with the most critical decision I have made in my life thus far.  I was forced to make a decision to give into circumstance that I found myself in and stop fighting OR pick myself up, flick the troubles off, and fight like hell for my life. I think it's obvious which path I chose.

Once the decision was made to fight, my first thought was how I do that as I thought I had been fighting for the last two years since I lost my job. Apparently, my efforts weren't too successful as my fight brought me to having to make this decision that day.

Immediately, my cousin Melvin popped into my head. As many of you know, he passed January 17th from his battle with cystic fibrosis. I know I have repeatedly stated that he was my Hero to everyone, but I honestly believed my hero saved my life that day.  Something told me that morning to watch the tribute video that I made of him. In the video is a poem, "God's Plan", written by Susan Lyons and me. 

While watching the video and being reminded of how Melvin lived his life with courage, strength, and determination, I immediately knew what I needed to do to fight for my life.

I needed to find the courage within myself to make a plan, the strength to follow that plan through to the end, and the determination to stick with the plan once it has been executed to completion.

It was as if God used my cousin to tell me that it wasn't time to give up yet.  That good things were coming for me.  That I should live my life for myself and not worry about the judgement received from others.  That God wants me to be happy and I should start living my life with the intention of being happy.  This moment I had with my cousin and God is the reason behind Project 52:  This is the Time of My Life.  

When I was in great need, he saved me. Psalm 116:6

This past weekend I was faced with another critical decision. Please watch the following video for more:

The first month of this three month plan was easier then I had ever expected. I had anticipated that living back home with my mother would bring challenges in its own that would make what I was doing even more difficult. Surprisingly, it was refreshing. The love and support I received from my family and friends here was breath taking. This made it easier to begin applying online for permanent positions and begin looking for that part time job here at home. Within two weeks of being home, the interviewing started. First tons of phone screens with companies, and then I was invited onsite for more formal interviews.

With these interviews, God would close one door, but then open up another. All doors to a part-time job at home closed as soon as they opened. It was obvious that I needed to look for permanent employment.

Month's two and three, July and August, brought many challenges of their own. They were very frustrating. It was hard to maintain a positive outlook after having been unemployed so long. I had to keep reminding myself that God was in control and that I need not worry.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:6-7

I had to learn to thank God for my current unemployed situation.  Thanks God for the job he was about to give me.  

Be joyful always; pray continually; give THANKS in ALL circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. - 1 Thessalonians 5:16

It wasn't until I fully submitted my unemployed situation to God that things started to change for me.  Trusting in the Lord with my life is one of the hardest most valuable lessons that I have had to learn.  

 
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6

Oh, wait a minute...I forgot to tell you the best part about this three month plan. A few days ago, I received a a call from Melvie's mother. She told me of a conversation that she had with Melvie on November 2, 2010.

For those of you who may not know or remember, back in October 2010, my cousin Melvie almost died. His oxygen levels were at around 6% and all major organs had failed except his heart kept beating. The doctors thought he was going to die as rigour mortise had already started to set in. When he opened his eyes he stunned the entire medical staff at the hospital because there was no reason medically why he was alive. It was a miracle.

Melvie told his mom the story of where he had ventured during this time in October when he almost died. He said while he was gone he learned a few things about some people. They were on the computer looking through facebook on his Prayers for Melvie Fan Page that I created for him. Out of the blue he said, "mom, I know what is wrong with Scott. Why he is unhappy." His mother went on to state a few things and I was completely stunned because the words he spoke to his mother while he was alive was the same words I felt was spoken to me on May 14th when I was faced with the decision to give up or fight for my life. That it was ok for me to be different and that I shouldn't worry about what anyone thinks of me. That I shouldn't care about someone else's judgement. That God was going to take care of everything, all my needs.  That I would be okay.

Keep in mind that I haven't seen or spoken to my cousin because of his illness in about 5 years because he lived hundreds of miles away.  The last time was at a family reunion in 2006.

I was completely speechless when she told me about that conversation she had with Melvie about me as it just proved to me that God is at work in my life and that He used my cousin to help. I received confirmation that I am on the right path. It was like God allowed Melvie to come back to us in October to help me.  As I write this, I am in complete AWE of how GOD has been working in my LIFE!

I pray I never forget the last 10 years of my life. I pray I am constantly reminded of what I went through, especially the last 2.5 years, so that I won't forget the forgiveness and grace I received from God.  I hope that I don't ever have to go down that path again, but if I do, I pray that the outcome is the same.  That I fully submit to God's will.

In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:6-7

Thanks YOU God for answering my prayer!